Posted 9:08 PM by sport

Partook of some absinthe the other night. Highest alcohol content of any swill I've ever swallowed as well as the highest percentage of thujone (the wormwood-derived neurotoxin that makes absinthe illegal) of all brands listed in my research. The effect was powerful and helpful even though I could FEEL the threat of poisoning from sip number one. I'll skip descriptions of the high. It was nice, and I didn't need to drink very much of the stuff (not that I physically could - but I still had more than I should've). Naturally, I drank it alone. The hangover was mostly a short-lived headache and a long-lived haze. It did briefly pull me somewhat out of about the worst depressive episode I can recall; last week I was suicidal around the clock. Things were a little "lighter" until Sunday night, when we were suddenly subjected to another horrible incident that I'll not go into. Missed seeing Jim, Carole and guests on Monday though. Seems that every measly little attempt to socialize gets dashed.

Shelley is suffering daily. We wanted a little hope in our lives, but so far the cost has been steep and constant.

I don't know what else to say. Life here gets harder and unhappier every fucking day, and I don't understand it.

I can send the glad news that Paul LaGrutta married lovely Julia in Las Vegas on Friday, taking a break from the busy smash success of their restaurant in order to fly out for the wedding. Love and congratulations to them both.

As I write, I feel the depression taking full hold again.
I will shut the hell up and leave it at that.
If you don't hear from me very much here, my apologies and fond regards to all.
What my loved ones and I need are miracles, and there are no such things.
See ya.